Monday, 8 December 2014

Wednesday, 3 December 2014

A New Year - A New Challenge

I think it's fair to say that there are some challenges in life that get easier with repetition. Tying your shoelaces, riding a bike, putting on condoms. However, Drycember is not like these challenges. First time round or third year running, there is an apprehension, a tension, a fear which comes as you approach the fateful month.

Now, I don't write these words with the intention of frightening people. On the contrary my brothers and sisters, I write these words to remind you that it's normal to have reservations, its normal to have temptations, but that we are all here with you, hand in hand, penis in trousers.

We hear at the #Drycember blog wish you all the best this year. May your spirit remain unbroken, just as your balls remain blue.

The Jizzster

Our Number One Fan - an apology

Today, I decided to open my email inbox to check if I could still remember my password. I could. Inside, I found a message from last year that I had callously not replied to. This post is dedicated to you, TangyTesticles. I hope you're with us this year.

In today's erectile news, I had a rager whilst on the bus. Feeling sleepy, I was forced to nap with my hands strategically placed over the crotch area. I hope no-one noticed. I'm fairly sure they didn't, but you never know. These are the Drycember struggles, ladies and gents.


Wednesday, 4 December 2013

An eternity...

Four days down and I'm not going to beat around the bush (if you'll pardon the pun), it's tough. Reading online tips on how to get rid of an erection without masturbating is but one of my extra curricular activities at the moment. Apparently some useful tips are to think of Susan Boyle (unless you're in to beastiality), put something in your lap (other than your hand) and wash your face. I am yet to try these methods out and will report back on their success rates when I have done so. Being out of the UK, alone with a good internet connection is a recipe for disaster, especially in Germany, where porn is both weirdly arousing and widely accessible.

Trying my best to ignore the signs

Remember stay strong, don't bash the bishop, don't charm the snake and don't make the bald man cry!

The Jester

Monday, 2 December 2013

Hard Times

First of all I'd like to say hello again from the Jizzster and congratulations to anyone reading this page, by even returning to take on the challenge again you have done yourself proud!

I think it's fair to say at this stage that the difficulty of this challenge is in no way diminished having completed it last year. If anything the awareness of the mental and physical trials that lie ahead only makes me more nervous and, because of this, more eager to break the oath.

In addition, unlike last year we three journeyman of this arduous trail are separated and can no longer give each other the level of moral support that was so vital in the success of the previous attempt. I wish you all luck in the weeks ahead. May your balls be blue, and your members throbbing.

The Jizzster

It's not going to be easy

So we're two days in and the worrying sign is, that I am absolutely gagging for a wank. I'm currently on a work placement and I've had a stressful, fairly shitty two days, and all I want to do is to book an appointment with Dr. Jerkoff. However due to the oath I swore when I undertook this challenge; this is no longer possible.

We would also like to wish Sergeant Spaff, our comrade from last year, well as he currently receives therapy for his porn and consequent masturbation addiction.

29 days to go...for all those joining us in our quest, good luck and spread the word!